I always read my fair share but for some reason my parents rarely, if ever, took me to Pizza Hut to redeem my awesome reading awards.
I think it is part of the reason why I always harbored bitter feelings toward Pizza Hut.
Hm, who knew?
I always hear about those little shits who didn't read but still got their prizes anyway.
What the hell? I read AND got dicked out of my mealy, tomato-paste cardboard crust pizza slice!
Bullshit.
Oh, anyway, we are reading Zone One for book club.
I started it.
It's kind of hard for me to follow this guy's writing style.
Maybe I need more comma's?
I also started watching The Walking Dead... I think I am overwhelming myself with the undead. It's hard to keep track of who is who and what is happening. Oh well, should make for an interesting CPBC.
On the plus side, I think I am making stuffed shells for tasty snacks.
Yay!
Monday, October 31, 2011
Friday, October 14, 2011
I'm sure some of you were confused...
Well, you can finally relax, I have the answer.
So I was re-reading some old blog posts and came across this gem:
Ruminate reminds me of Rheumatism... so whenever someone says Ruminate, I think of asses.
Weird huh?
It didn't occur to me at the time, but looking back I realized Rheumatism is a pretty generic disease basically having nothing to do with peoples' posteriors and the only reason I associate it with such is because Maria from the Sound of Music sits on a pine cone, freaks out, and blames it on Rheumatism, forever solidifying in my mind the idea that Rheumatism was a sickness of the butt.
Thanks family Von Trapp for NOT clearing that up. How is a 6 year old supposed to know these things you Austrian bastards?!
If your thought process is anything like mine, well, I pity you first and foremost, but while writing this I instantly decided this would be an absolutely fabulous hemorrhoid commercial.
First we have awareness and shame:
...
...
Okay, so apparently no one has ever in the history of the world Google'd Julie Andrews and Pine Cone before, but whatever.
You know the scene I am talking about.
She sits down. Gets impaled by a pine cone. She leaps up. Children laugh. Captain Von Trapp is less than amused. She blames Rheumatism. My future as a medical professional is ruined. Captain Von Trapp secretly starts falling in love with her. You know, that old routine.
Now... after the miracle 'RRhoidAway treatment, she is feeling much better!
Anyways. Sorry for confusing you and leaving you hanging all this time.
I know it's been keeping you up at night.
-MeliZard
So I was re-reading some old blog posts and came across this gem:
Ruminations
Weird huh?
It didn't occur to me at the time, but looking back I realized Rheumatism is a pretty generic disease basically having nothing to do with peoples' posteriors and the only reason I associate it with such is because Maria from the Sound of Music sits on a pine cone, freaks out, and blames it on Rheumatism, forever solidifying in my mind the idea that Rheumatism was a sickness of the butt.
Thanks family Von Trapp for NOT clearing that up. How is a 6 year old supposed to know these things you Austrian bastards?!
If your thought process is anything like mine, well, I pity you first and foremost, but while writing this I instantly decided this would be an absolutely fabulous hemorrhoid commercial.
First we have awareness and shame:
...
...
Okay, so apparently no one has ever in the history of the world Google'd Julie Andrews and Pine Cone before, but whatever.
You know the scene I am talking about.
She sits down. Gets impaled by a pine cone. She leaps up. Children laugh. Captain Von Trapp is less than amused. She blames Rheumatism. My future as a medical professional is ruined. Captain Von Trapp secretly starts falling in love with her. You know, that old routine.
Now... after the miracle 'RRhoidAway treatment, she is feeling much better!
Anyways. Sorry for confusing you and leaving you hanging all this time.
I know it's been keeping you up at night.
-MeliZard
Thursday, October 13, 2011
Slacking and HeLacking
See what I did there?
So, Henrietta Lacks book club at Shannon's was a success with tasty cheeses, hummus and enough cupcakes to send a walrus into hypoglycemic shock.
Now that I got myself wife'd Mark and I can host the next one but it might not make the October cut.
What with birthdays and Halloweener I'm not sure I want to cram it in there.
November is typically boring until Slapsgiving so early Movember could be where it's at.
Now to think of books... oh yes, the options.
Mwahahahhaha!
So, Henrietta Lacks book club at Shannon's was a success with tasty cheeses, hummus and enough cupcakes to send a walrus into hypoglycemic shock.
Now that I got myself wife'd Mark and I can host the next one but it might not make the October cut.
What with birthdays and Halloweener I'm not sure I want to cram it in there.
November is typically boring until Slapsgiving so early Movember could be where it's at.
Now to think of books... oh yes, the options.
Mwahahahhaha!
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